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The Nitpicker is a magical item procured by Merle from Fantasy Costco in Ep. 28. His real name is Ernest, though Merle attempted to name him Bud.


The Nitpicker is a highly sarcastic, cantankerous humanoid resembling a garden gnome. Twice a day, it can be brought into the presence of a lock, wherein it becomes animated and picks the lock. While working, the Nitpicker criticizes the members of the party on their recent performance in the campaign.

Episodes Used[]

  • The Nitpicker is first used in Ep. 32 to unlock a safe in Lucas’ private quarters. Merle attempts to name the Nitpicker “Bud,” but the Nitpicker insists that his name is Ernest.
  • In Ep. 43, the Nitpicker is used to unlock a gate to the quarry. While picklocking the gate, Nitpicker complains about the "stink meat" Merle keeps in his bag.
  • In Ep. 59, Merle attempts to use Nitpicker on a keypad in Lucretia's private quarters, only to be chastised by Nitpicker for not using him for his proper use, which is picking locks.


  • The Nitpicker was invented by podcast listener “Tom H.”