The Nitpicker is a highly sarcastic, cantankerous humanoid resembling a garden gnome. Twice a day, it can be brought into the presence of a lock, wherein it becomes animated and picks the lock. While working, the Nitpicker criticizes the members of the party on their recent performance in the campaign.
- The Nitpicker is first used in Ep. 32 to unlock a safe in Lucas’ private quarters. Merle attempts to name the Nitpicker “Bud,” but the Nitpicker insists that his name is Ernest.
- In Ep. 43, the Nitpicker is used to unlock a gate to the quarry. While picklocking the gate, Nitpicker complains about the "stink meat" Merle keeps in his bag.
- In Ep. 59, Merle attempts to use Nitpicker on a keypad in Lucretia's private quarters, only to be chastised by Nitpicker for not using him for his proper use, which is picking locks.
- The Nitpicker was invented by podcast listener “Tom H.”